There was promise that I made for our family just a month ago , a promise to spread our happiness for our family, which is our little secret. This story belong to my wife and my son or daughter who are still in womb, not yet born, still young 2 months old.
I can’t provide anything in this journey which our family has, which i think this journey is a wonderful journey. Sometime I have to say I put much of my time in architecture, how I can help people, nurturing staffs, creating ideas, it is simply doing stuffs that I love. To be honest, sometime I feel very guilty not to pay attention, giving time for all of you Son/Daughter, in which I have to say thank you for all of the generosity, all of the patience, that you have to me. Son/Daughter, I hope our journey in the day that you are born, will come true, as we, your mother, and me your father, really miss you so much, by happiness not by tears, by joy, not by sadness.
To release our past, it is not so easy, there is affiliation with past that we always remember, but Me, your father and Laurensia, your mother have been trying to accept our life, our human condition, that makes us just like who we are. In our heart, we only hope that your coming to our life will fill emptiness in our heart, to release our past.
In this such extraordinary time that I did in architecture, such tremendous hours in one day, I’m working hard, just like other father doing the best, to push their best, to show to you, your mom or even to egoistical myself that I can take care of our family. I really want to learn from you for doing another the very best mistakes that I have, and learning what the best from the best people that we will face in this live, together as family. I am just afraid that I always try to help others, but for the people that I care most, I forgot to pay attention to. Laurensia has fear of losing you son / daughter, I am in a huge fear of losing you. In our young age, i must say, we were taught to feel lost of family, lost of son of daughter and son several times. It brought scar in our heart. Some people said that in order to be strong you have to release pain, give medicine to your scar, you have to release your past.
I hope that this journey will be happy ending, at least for you, so you can meet your beautiful mother, Laurensia, who has always been missing you, who has been in tears for losing someone special. I really miss you, and hopefully God will answer your mom’s and father’s prayer that we can do this adventure together, we already have huge plan for you and your will be little sisters and your will be little brothers. That was the promise, and the promise is a way to keep our faith in life.
love to you,
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My Mayonnaise Jar 